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Goodbye 2018 – Hello 2019!

January 2, 2019
Happy New Year, everybody! I can’t believe as I’m sitting writing this we’re in 2019, 2018 flew by and it didn’t seem two minutes since we were welcoming it!
2018, you’ve provided the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. So much happened last year that in a way, I’m glad to see the back of it.
January started with me revising for my end of year exams and soon came and went. February was a much better month, a lot less stress and spending quality time with Charlie, we spent Valentines weekend away and it was a fresh of breath air.
Although I was completely happy with my relationships (both family and Charlie). I was unaware the next few months would be the hardest months I’d face. I never thought I’d say this, but I was subjected to a personal vendetta and actually feared for myself – I was bullied. Yes, bullied. By a fully grown woman throughout my last months of University, it was so hard for me to pluck up the courage and attend lectures whilst trying to study and pretend everything was fine. I really was not fine, everyone around me knew what was happening as I had told them but it still didn’t stop what was happening. Something ended up happening where I had a panic attack in the middle of Uni alone, I realised I had no choice but to tell someone in Uni, I had so much support from everyone and soon enough the problem was resolved – but it still hadn’t made me feel good. I knew everything was suffering due to the way I was feeling so I had to get through it and hope for the best.
Throughout this world wind time, I celebrated my birthday and got completely spoilt, spent time with family and seriously tried to ignore the fact my mental health was reaching rock bottom – after waiting for a long time, I finally had an appointment with a psychiatrist and was put under the adult mental health. I finally got my diagnoses I knew I needed to be able to accept things and move forward but this wasn’t the case. I was placed on even MORE medication and told I would have a follow up whilst being placed on emergency counselling as I was high risk – this is where the system failed me, 7 months later and I still haven’t heard anything, so much for being an emergency. While my mental health has been the biggest challenge of 2018, I don’t feel comfortable disclosing my illnesses as all my life I have felt powerless, and with this I feel like this is the only thing I have power over.
After FINALLY finishing Uni and finishing my exams at the end of May, I was so glad to see the back of it. Everybody says University is the best time of their life, unfortunately, for me this wasn’t the case – although I’m back doing my Masters degree, it’s a completely different experience this time around. The next few months flew by as I was awaiting my results and getting ready for graduation. Graduation flashed by in a blur, and although I was so excited, I was still so scared to see people what had happened previously, but hey go me, I left with a law degree (2:1).
I had the most amazing summer, I spent time with people who I wanted to be around. Me and Charlie had our first holiday abroad and it has only made us want to travel more, I had the best 2 weeks in Gran Canaria and have memories I will treasure forever. When I got back from holiday, I had my conformation saying I had been accepted to do my Masters in Law and Banking – I was so over the moon and determined not to let anything upset me this year. After starting my Masters in September, I knew it was one of the best decisions I had made for myself, despite still having dark days. Now I feel like the past three months have flew by and I’m only just realising I’m already half way through my Masters!! It’s gone so quick.
December was the best month by far, I love Christmas so much and I was really in the mood this year. Me and Charlie travelled to Amsterdam the week before Christmas and it couldn’t have felt more festive. It went by so fast that before we knew it we were back home and ready to spend Christmas with our families. It was such a special time and we created so many memories which I will cherish!
        January – met up with the girls for a long overdue catch up!
February – date night for Valentines Day!
March – my birthday month!
April – getting everything ready to submit by 10,000 word dissertation!
May – cutting over 25″ off my hair!
June – I visited London for the first time!
July – Spent quality time with friends!
July – Graduated with a 2:1 Law degree!
August – Me and Charlie went on our first holiday abroad (Gran Canaria)!
September – had another catch up with the girls!
October – carving pumpkins with family!
November – Fell in love with Starbucks Christmas Menu!
December – went to Amsterdam with Charlie!
December – Ended the year with you!
That brings us to now, January 2019 – I’ve decided not to make any ‘resolutions’ as they’re something I never stick to, rather I’ve decided to make small changes, throughout each month which will ultimately help me to achieve future goals and help me become a better person. A few things I want to focus on in 2019:
  • Complete my Masters degree (graduate in December this year)
  • Start driving lessons and pass my test this year
  • Try to seek counselling (this will probably be the hardest thing I will face but I feel it’s necessary)
  • To follow, concentrate on my mental health. I always feel bad when I’m having my dull times and always blame myself, I need to come to the realisation that I can’t control the way I am feeling, I’m feeling this way for a reason and I need to deal with it in my own time – not push myself.
  • Travel to 3 different places (we have Florida planned for     August, so just two more to go)
  • Grow my Instagram following to 8,000 followers
I hope that you have a fabulous 2019, that you follow your dreams and you make this your year!

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